Sounds surround
Me
Faces pass
Me
In skies that aren't
So blue
In winds not
So strong
Each step seems to
Be a half
Every breath taken
Doesn't satisfy
Broken roads
That lead no where
Cracks in walls
That make the
Building fall
In sounds not so sweet
Seeming so far and distant
In skies that separate
They aren't the same
Heat and Chill
Never really mixed
In faces that don't look
So familiar
Pale and tan
There is here
And there is there

I've said it
More than once
But this time I mean
It
I'm moving on
It won't be easy
It hasn't been so far
It won't happen in one day
But you are fading fast
And I can't keep
Chasing shadows
Ghosts that aren't there anymore
So I turn around
And look for real flesh and blood
Someone warm
Because I can't stay frozen forever

What I want most
Isn't in this world
Isn't what you try
To give me
False hope
False love
False sense of security
You say Sorry
But is it real
Does it have any content
Is it like the leaf in the wind
Taken away when you make the
Wind blow again

This isn't easy to say
This isn't easy to write
This isn't easy to remember
I can't look in the sky and see your name
I can't look at pictures and see your face
It's not the same
It hasn't been the same
Life tells me to smile
But you make it hard to do so
When I hear your name
I think of what you've done to me
I think of the life you've lead
Making me the past you wish to forget
I waited
I faded
You faded
We faded and now pictures
Burn in the sun
Blinded us from eachother

Memories
That pain me to remember
Do they hurt you too?
Or do guys simply get up
And run?
I wanted to remember
That you hurt me,
But I see I hurt you.
Was I in control
or did I get up and run?
Could you forgive me
Or have you forgotten?
Memories make me sick
Make me laugh
When I remember your smile
And my stomach flipping like
Dolphins
Do you remember
Or did we run?

Haha
I fall into
My own trap
Thinking and
Thinking over
And over
My brain is on
Repeat
Finding cracks
And hidden messages
That aren't there
Hoping to fake
What isn't real
Haha
The joke is on me

I'll just say it
I hate you
I hate that I can't
Forget you
I hate that I met you
I hate that we act like
Friends
But you pretend more
I hate that I wait like a
Puppy hoping
You come home soon
I hate that this nightmare never ends
I hate that your in my world
Pushing repeat again and again
Let it go
Let me go
I hate that I cry for help
But you don't mind my
Screams
I hate that your ghostly figure
Lingers
I hate that so many miles
Doesn't seem to matter
I hate that you find
Your way into cracks
So small
I hate everything
and nothing about
You!!!!

Like a flash light
It shines on my
Face
Waking me to
The morning
And as I ignore
Nature's alarm
I push out reasons
To get up
What if I just forget
Pull the covers over
And slip away
The walls so white
Can be the rain
Trapping me in a box
The door my window
The window my door
My bed can be
My ship
Sailing away
On blue carpet
As my belongings
Bob in the deep sea
Where I would bob
And be swallowed by
The sea
Until the flash light
Finds me again
Trying to wake me

Almost full grown
But still deciding on
What to be
Who to be
How to be
You
Pretending you know
So much
And hiding your empty
Mind
Pushed and shoved
Into the crowd
You let it swallow you whole
Ignoring hands that reach out
Wanting to fly
Without realizing your wings
Aren't real
Hearing things you want to
Disappear
But I will never disappear

Hands stained
With lies
Knots in trees
Twisted with truth
Hearts filled with
Old Promises
Skies covered in
Repeated days
Holding out for
Something that isn't
Real
Teasing you with what
They say they are
But lie about what
They are

I can't say that I am sorry
I won't say that it was a mistake
Talking to you
Wasn't what I had planned
But falling into your world
With words that make me trip
Make me spin
Into your trap
It was so easy
Pushing me in
Wasn't it?
I laugh in my dreams
But cry when I wake
Why do you send a message
Then pull it out of my hands
You must think I am a fool
Watching me struggle to stand
Without you
Standing behind that one way mirror
And if I told you the truth
That you are too cruel
Being something that I can't have
Would you leave?
This time for good?
Because haunting me
Is doing no one any good
This world I've built in my mind needs
To fall
Will you help me tear it down?
Or build it again?

I tell myself
I am a fool
Playing the jester
Against my will
But laughing
Is better than crying
Over something
That was never meant
To happen
Something I fell for
Again
I am a fool
For believing you

I mix my dreams
In with reality
I let them
Run through
My head
And still I
Wonder why
I feel like
I imagined it all

It's all in the end
The last word
Question
You always seem
To leave me with
Sitting
Thinking
Of what you mean
What you want
What you try to take
and break again
So nice and polite
Then cold and gone
Before I have chance
To smile
At what I thought was
So true

Is it time to give
You a chance
Even if it isn't what
I want
What I wished for
It is better than forgetting
You and Me
You may
Be alone
And so am I
But at least we aren't pretending

I read in between
The lines
Even when there is nothing
There
I look for clues to help
Me see if you
Are coming after me
Again
Are you friendly
Or lonely
I read into what you
Say
Trapping me before I realize
What I am doing
Again

I feel giddy
Happy
When you see
talk
touch
me
I feel sad
Forgotten
When you turn away
are silent
leave
me
Tell me
Do you mean to hurt me
Or are you just scared you
Feel the same way
Because I desperately seek
either

This old scar
Makes me laugh
Makes me cry
Makes see
That you needed
To hurt me
I needed to feel
This
This scar reminds me
Of you
Reminds me that you
were my first heartbreak
Reminds me that things
Mend
This old scar is a piece of
you that is with me

I don't know if
I can trust your
Words
I don't know if
I can look you in
The eye
And see the man
I need
I can't stand for my
Heart to be broken
Again by you
If I can't love you
Then why do I
Still look for reasons to
Keep you

In one swift moment
You pass by
How can I tell
If you're the one
Are you what I've
Been searching for
I can't get you out of
My head
You're like this faded picture
Worn and torn in my heart
Then you seem to reappear
Vibrant and full of life
How can I let go of something
That never dies
How do I know your
My one true love

I hate that
You walk right in
Never do much
Just being there
Makes me quiver
I can't tell my
Stomach to stop
And my heart
Races
I can't talk
So you take over
The conversation
I hate that you
Can leave whenever
You please
But I stay stuck
On my few moments
With you
I hate that you have uncanny
Timing and show
Up when I have
Almost forgotten you
But most of all
I hate
That I can't stop
Loving you

Darkness
Falls into
My hands
Deep in my
Palms I
Feel the pulse
Of life
Flowing through
Me

Wall of people
Search for gaps
Holes they can
Sink into
Like quicksand
Slow sink
into the walls
Holding knowledge
That cost them
So much
A wall of people
Sunk in reality

But you haunt
me day and night
I cannot sleep
Yeah your in
My dreams
Oh what does this mean
I thought that I
Had given you up
A long time ago
Yeah I thought
You were dead
To the world
In which I wander
But I do see
That you are a part of me
And I can't
Give you up
You're like a never ending song
That plays
In my heart
Sweet and bitter all at the same time
And my tears are not for what I didn't have
They're for the days that seem so far away
You seem so far away from me

Fresh air
Fills my lungs
Hungry for more
Engulfed in wind
Pushing me
Ever so slightly
In the direction I head
The path itself
Is farther than I can see
Carrying me so lightly
The breeze holds
me up
When I feel like falling
Clear mind
Clouded heart
Fresh air
Holds me together

Cool off sun
there ain't no reason
to sweat
Just a couple of kids
out looking for spring
Lay off their backs
You've got until
June
To tease them
with the Heat